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It also continues to use disparaging terms like "irregular" to describe same-sex unions, he said.īianco spoke of 76-year-old John DelMistro, who was once told by a priest, "You need to repent and squash that part of you or you will go to hell."ĭelMistro and his partner of 35 years raised DelMistro's niece after his sister was killed. He said it does not offer a way for gay unions to be blessed or clarify mixed messages from the hierarchy. In his talk Bianco both celebrated Amoris Laetitia and lamented it did not go far enough. To try and convey this belief, he opted for a presentation featuring the stories of four Catholics - an older gay man, Traylor, a transgender woman and a married lesbian. I truly believe in my heart God is calling all people to feel welcome in the church." "But I don't consider myself liberal or conservative.
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"Often people who don't know me automatically think, 'Oh, he's just another liberal trying to push his agenda,' " said Bianco. When Bianco was asked to speak at the conference in Rome this May, he felt a mix of surprise, joy and worry. Traylor called Bianco his "guardian angel." "But Aaron showed me it's OK to accept myself." "Being gay and Catholic is difficult," Traylor told NCR. A few years ago, the gay young man attempted to take his life. One of his former students is 20-year-old Cameron Traylor. The Virginia-based Lepanto Institute ran a 12-page diatribe on him. Articles with pictures of Bianco, his husband and his late mother were published on Church Militant and LifeSite News websites. John the Evangelist, far-right and fringe Catholic groups soon began to target Bianco. (He has not, however, sanctioned gay marriage or otherwise altered church teaching last year he approved a decree that barred priests from blessing gay couples and stated God "cannot bless sin.")Īt St. In 2013, he rattled some and delighted others with his "Who am I to judge?" comment. The catechism calls homosexual acts "intrinsically disordered" but says gay and lesbian individuals "must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity." Throughout his pontificate, Francis has emphasized the latter. San Diego Cardinal-designate Robert McElroy, inspired by Francis, had encouraged the parish to establish a ministry to LGBTQ Catholics, and Bianco started one that flourished. John the Evangelist, located in a historically gay neighborhood. The church is not perfect, but I can do whatever I can do in my own little way to make it better."Īfter decerning the priesthood was not the right fit, Bianco took a job teaching theology at the University of San Diego and began work at St. "But with prayer I came to realize - this is my home. The hierarchy would say things that made him question if he should remain in the church, he said. I'm convinced Jesus would want all of us at the table."īianco, who spent time studying for the priesthood, wasn't always sure he was welcome at the table. "I'm going to do everything I can to do what he said. "To hear the Holy Father say what he did, it gave me gas in the tank," Bianco told NCR after returning from Italy. He handed the pope a letter with the stories of LGBTQ individuals Francis offered him encouragement. Bianco recalled how Francis clasped his hands and smiled warmly. As part of the conference, the pope gave a speech, and then presenters, including Bianco, were invited to meet with him briefly. The aim of the gathering, which brought together bishops, priests, women religious and theologians, was to implement more fully Amoris Laetitia ("The Joy of Love").ĭuring the May 11-15 event at Rome's Pontifical Gregorian University, Bianco discussed LGBTQ Catholics in the context of the landmark document.
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This year he was invited to speak at an international conference on Pope Francis' 2016 document on marriage and family life. But he never stopped ministering to gay, lesbian and transgender Catholics, as well as young people who felt alienated from the church. The relentless threats and harassment had pushed Bianco from his post at St.
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"He smiled and said, 'You must make them feel welcome.' " "The pope told me to keep working with those who do not feel welcome in the church," recalled Bianco. This time it was at the Vatican and from Pope Francis. Nearly four years later, Bianco received another memorable message. One morning he walked into his church office and discovered a message in yellow spray paint. He also received death threats, had his car tires slashed and was the target of vitriol-packed manifestos from far-right Catholic organizations. As pastoral associate for a San Diego church, Aaron Bianco, who is gay and civilly married, helped revitalize the parish and establish a ministry for LGBTQ members.